I Never Liked Normal Anyway

It's been a banner few weeks with the CDC opining that we don't need masks outside and those who are fully vaccinated no longer need to wear masks inside. I have to admit: it feels strange to be able to get rid of the mask. It's been such a weird 15 months, and getting back to "normal" (whatever that is) is going to take a minute. My mixed feelings make me realize I never really liked normal anyway.

My son's school has been virtual all year. Even though I can go without a mask in public places now my son still isn't attending school. There are four weeks of school left, but you can bet we're all phoning it in. I have some anxiety about sending him back out into the camp/school world because children still can't be vaccinated. It means I'm counting on teachers and child care professionals and other parents to vaccinate to keep my kid safe. That's a lot of trust in a year when we discovered a lot of folks don't care about their neighbors and their communities. I admittedly feel anxious about it. 

Given that we still don't have childcare, I don't intend to go back into an office. To be honest? I don't want to. I worked remotely before my job at the city, and now that I've discovered I can do my entire job remotely and supplement with events and in person networking as needed, I don't want to go back to the office as if life is "normal". And I can't because again my son is still in school online for another month or so. It turns out life post-vaccination won't go back to normal as we knew it in early March of 2020. There's a new normal in town. 

I remember saying in early 2020 that once my son was in school I'd want to have more flexibility on Wednesday mornings because the district starts later that day. I was told no and was sent links to before school programs. Now Wednesdays, my son's asynchronous (no screen time) day, are sacred. I try to keep it open and we go to the zoo or the science center or ride bikes. Wednesdays are our day, and work comes in a distant second (and sometimes not even that high on the list) on those days.

Another Wednesday at the zoo.

I've learned a lot about myself in the last year. I've learned that my priorities were insanely out of whack. I've learned that I no longer want my phone to ring often in the evenings and on weekends for every emergency (and more likely every non-emergency) that pops up. I've learned I can work a fraction as many hours and control my own schedule. I've learned that I can work with clients and on projects where things like time off and family time are considered sacred. 

Lunchtime bike rides with my little dude.

Instead of being gone every single weekend we've been home, and I've learned that being home more often is glorious. Having friends over, catching up on projects around the house, taking naps and reading good books have replaced the constant busy. I have gained a balance that I don't know I've had as a parent, and one I definitely didn't have the last 3½ years. My life is my own again.

After more than a year of mostly being locked down, I'm excited to get back to something that feels more normal. But I do know I've changed a lot in the last year. Normal in 2021 doesn't look like it did in the past. And I'm 100% okay with that.