Posts

Showing posts from May, 2017

Am I Still a Runner?

I've been hospitalized three times in the last twelve months. I have to let you in on a little secret: I'm over it. For the first time in nearly 20 years of suffering with Crohn's Disease, Crohn's has defeated my attitude. People have always told me I'm so positive, and they don't know how I deal with it. The answer is you just deal with it. What's the alternative? But the last year and in particular the last eight months has wreaked havoc on my body and my positive psyche, and I'm not amused. I had an abscess drained in October, and the plan was to keep it draining until the abscess was healed. It's now June, nearly eight months since that procedure, and the abscess is still draining. It's as delightful as you might imagine. I've discovered things I never thought I'd know, like the best gauze for my constant abscess bandage is the 4x4 squares at Meijer. Tuck that away for future reference in case you need a constant supply of gauze.

Wedding Crashers

Image
In eleven years of togetherness my husband and I have been invited to 47 weddings. This includes five weddings this year. We've already received three invitations and two save the dates. We have attended 33 of the weddings to which we've been invited, and we plan to attend all five this year, taking us to having attended a grand total of 38 weddings by the end of the year. I've attended more weddings than most caterers. I also decided for purposes of this blog to try to find photos from all the weddings we've attended. I mostly succeeded, and I've discovered 1) my hair has really evolved over the last dozen years and 2) I have several dresses that were really fan favorites. I've been thinking a lot about weddings lately mainly because we continue to be invited to so many of them. In 2008 we attended six weddings, the last of which was our own in December. I've learned a lot about what makes weddings good (or average. The goal is to leave thinking i

The Wisdom to Know the Difference

Image
Last week my friend lost his battle to alcoholism when he took his own life. I've spent the last week reflecting and thinking about the impact that disease has on so many. My family and I drove 400 miles one way to Michigan's Upper Peninsula to celebrate his life. It was the most genuine service I've ever attended. I laughed, I cried, and I forgot about the way in which John lost his life. He was an alcoholic, but that was only a part of a wonderful human who touched so many lives. It's a disease we don't discuss or we discuss with shame, and so many people are affected by it. It forces those suffering to hide. My dad, Rick Jones, was an alcoholic. I talked to my mom before writing this blog because there is a stigma. It's hard to say those words out loud let alone see them on the screen. But alcoholism affected every member of my family in different ways. My mom bore the brunt of it, but this is not her story. My sister is six years older and had a different

How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?

Image
Writing is one of my biggest forms of therapy, and tonight I need some therapy. But I've been sitting here for about ten minutes, sipping a glass of wine and starring at the blinking cursor on my computer wondering what to say or if I should say anything at all. It hurts a little to breathe, and I feel numb. Grief does that to me. I should warn you I'm probably going to swear a lot. I'm so fucking sad that I can't even articulate it. Today I lost a good friend, and it's devastating. Is there a word that's means more devastating than devastating? The thesaurus gave me 'annihilating'. Yeah, that's how I feel.  I'm typing and erasing and retyping, and I can't get it right. Bear with me as I figure out what to say. Having worked for a statewide association I know a lot of local officials. When those officials get elected to the legislature there's always a special connection, but John was different. He wasn't just a former member who

I Don't Play Well with Others

Image
I don't like to play team sports. It's totally not my thing. I enjoy watching sports, but I prefer activities that I can do alone and get into my own head. I almost always run alone. I have a gym membership, but usually go to the gym at our country club that rarely has others using it. When I work out I want it to be quiet and reflective. I do listen to music when I run on the treadmill, but I don't need anyone to be around to hear me singing Bruno Mars or Justin Timberlake at the top of my lungs (a different type of reflection). I'm used to running 4-5 days a week, and the Crohn's infection I've had for the last six months has sidelined me. I've tried walking, and I've been doing high intensity interval training (HIIT) videos at home. But nothing replaces running. Nothing clears the cobwebs out of my head like a hard run. I haven't run more than 4 miles since the Detroit Half Marathon last October. It's my biggest running drought in a deca