Wednesday, October 16, 2013

An Attitude of Gratitude

Last weekend during mass our deacon gave a homily discussing the need to have an "attitude of gratitude". The gist was that we are always looking for the next exciting thing instead of appreciating and enjoying the blessings we have in our own lives.

I have to admit that lately I have not had an attitude of gratitude. I've had an attitude, but it's been surly and impatient.  I realize that it's happening, but I've been powerless to stop it. Instead of being grateful for the many things I have in my life, I've been restless and testy. I've been ignoring the grace that already exists in my own life and have been looking for something more. I don't know what that something is, but I've been going out of my way to find it.

We've been waiting for 19 months in our adoption process. I'm restless and frustrated and just wanting to DO something. I know there's nothing we can do but continue to wait, and the wait feels interminable. Overall it's been about four and a half years of waiting to have a child. And holding my breath. And hoping, although hope is more fleeting these days.

Therein lies my problem. Yes, we're waiting to have a baby, but we have the opportunity to adopt. We have great jobs, the most supportive friends anyone could imagine, loving families, pets we adore. We're at a place in our life where we can travel any time we want to. We have the freedom to come and go as we please, and we do. It's incredible to have the ability to travel like we do. Have I been appreciating it? Not like I should. Traveling is necessary for me because I'm a restless person in general, but I haven't been appreciating it.

Our adoption agency tweeted this picture. Something I need to keep in mind.
The message hit home for me, and I realized what a brat I'm being.  That doesn't mean it will always be easy for me to accept the inequities in life, but I'll be trying. I'll be working hard to adopt an attitude of gratitude. Sure, some days are harder than others for all of us, but there are blessings in every one of them. I've got to remember to count them.

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