It Isn't What it Is

I truly detest the phrase "it is what it is". I hear people say it regularly, and I cringe every single time. Because when I hear "it is what it is" I hear "I no longer care enough about whatever IT is to react in a different way". Saying "it is what it is" isn't accepting what one can't change. It's indifference to how you can react to the things you can't control. 

Of course there are circumstances beyond our control where we cannot change or anticipate the outcome. Maybe it's an illness or an accident or someone else's decision that you cannot change. But to take whatever this circumstance is and say "well it is what it is" just feels like giving up. Sure, there are things I can't change. But what I CAN change is my reaction and how I manage the things that are out of my control. 

I have a chronic illness. I could say "well it is what it is". I have Crohn's. I can't change it. So I'm going to give into it. Screw that. I have Crohn's, and it's fucking hard. The last few weeks I've been feeling really, really awful. I got lab work, and my iron plummeted to serious anemia levels since my last blood draw in October. I'm exhausted, and it's been a struggle. I see my hematologist this week, and hopefully I'll get an iron infusion ASAP to help. And until then I've been trying to be kinder to myself. I've rescheduled some meetings that weren't urgent, and I even napped last week. Crazy talk. I can't always anticipate the impact my chronic illness will have on my body, but I can ALWAYS control how I react to it. Attitude is everything. I truly believe my positive outlook is how I manage the disease so well. It ISN'T what it is. 

Third 5k of 2025. I'll be honest: it was a struggle the whole time. 
But I did it becuase my goal is important to me. 

There's a whole lot of uncertainty in the world right now, and it would be very easy to turtle and brace for (hopefully metaphorical) impact. Instead of saying "it is what it is" I've decided to be very intentional about the work I do and to focus on the impact I can have in my community. I can't control a whole lot of things, but I can focus on my work and impact and try to block out the noise (which I appreciate is very, very hard). I know a lot of people feel angry and frustrated and all the things. Those emotions are very valid. But feeling defeated isn't an option. What can I control? That's the focus. 

I work with communities and community partners to focus on innovation and community building. We're supposed to be driving change and reacting to the hard things. If there's a roadblock in my path it would be easy to stop pushing because I can't move it. Typical "it is what it is". OR I can find a way to go around it. Being indifferent doesn't create lasting change. 

Life is hard. We're all going to be thrown so many curve balls over the course of it, and it's really, really easy to throw up our hands because there are things we can't control. But we can control ourselves: our reactions, our passion, our intention. When I am faced with something I can't control (like being so tired the last few weeks I cannot even), I focus on what I can control and how I can be the best version of myself despite what life throws at me. It absolutely isn't what it is, and I refuse to accept it.