Who Moves to Michigan in February?

In early 2005 life was pretty good. I had a job I enjoyed, my own place in a neighborhood I loved, and I was coming into my own as a professional adult human. My Crohn's was under control, and I felt confident about my disease. I was heading to see my boyfriend in Florida early one January morning when I got a call from my sister that she'd been in a fender bender, and she was now in labor several weeks early with my niece.

I called my boyfriend to cancel the trip, and he was super irritated by it. My only sister was in labor with my first niece, and he expected me to miss it. (Red flag number 8,463). I got to be in the delivery room when my beautiful niece was born, and I didn't realize then that it would likely be the only time I'd ever seen a baby being born. It was a special way to start 2005. 

With my newborn niece at her baby shower (that she got to attend)

That summer my health was great for the first time in years. I hung out with my sister and niece, spent time with friends, visited my boyfriend in Florida and then later in Michigan when he went back there. It felt like my life was falling into place, but I felt a little lonely in Virginia. My sister was there, but she was appropriately in a different place than I was with a new baby. Most of my friends in Virginia were much older than me or had kids, and I didn't feel like I had many friends of my own. 

It was pretty fun to meet celebs at work including my football hero Emmitt Smith
and Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa

My boyfriend was living all over the place, and he started pressuring me to move to Michigan. He wasn't living there himself, but he ultimately wanted that to be home base. We'd been dating for over a year at that point, but I wasn't going to move to Michigan just for him. I told him if I got a job there I'd consider moving for work, but I wasn't moving for him. 

That fall he surprised me by telling me he'd be heading to Iraq for a year to do a civilian job that would pay an ungodly amount of money. He announced it like he was doing me some kind of favor, but he hadn't discussed it with me, and I was furious. He left for Iraq that fall, right after he'd paid for me to join his parents and sister and her husband on a cruise. Then he weirdly insisted I take the cruise.

I called a girlfriend and took the damn cruise, letting him pay for everything. We had a blast, and I mostly avoided his family as much as possible. Despite this I was looking for jobs in Michigan, and it felt like the change I needed.

Cruising in Honduras

I went to Washington, DC with my siblings for New Years Eve, and I will never forget my brother saying "Shut up. You're not moving to Michigan." A week later I interviewed for and was offered a job for a Republican Senator from Southeast Michigan. It was a significant pay cut, and the legislator was term limited, so I turned it down. 

Then I received and accepted an offer to work on local government policy for the Michigan House Republican Policy Office. I told the Mayor I was leaving the week of his State of the City, and he was not amused.

On February 4, 2006 my parents, brother and I made a caravan with our two cars and a moving van to get to Michigan. It was warm and rainy in Virginia when we left. We planned to drive the 12 hours to Michigan that day. When we got to Ohio that evening we hit heavy snow. I was driving the moving truck and couldn't see anything. The turnpike ended up closing, and we pulled off at a hotel for the night. When I walked into the hotel carrying my cats in their carriers, I saw a sign that said no pets and started crying. The desk clerk let me bring the cats, and then I realized I couldn't find my phone. It must've fallen out in the snow at our last stop, so here we were, snowed in somewhere in Ohio, and I was phoneless.

With my family my last night in Norfolk

The next morning we completed the drive to Lansing. As we unpacked the moving truck in 7 degree weather, my dad looked at me and said, "Are you sure Sissy?" I wasn't, but there was no going back.

We'd arrived a day later than expected, and we couldn't unload the truck in time to return it. I emailed my new office manager to let her know I'd be late on my first day because the office opened at 9, the same time as the rental truck facility. 

I walked into the House Office Building on my first day to a group of young, enthusiastic staffers who were all so nice except for one guy. He seemed nice to everyone else and was making the whole office laugh, but he was really rude to me. I asked a new colleague what his deal was, and she shrugged and said he generally liked everyone. That made me even more curious as to why he didn't like me.

But here I was, living in Michigan. I didn't know anyone, but I quickly bonded with my colleagues and loved my work in the legislature. Shortly after arriving a big group of us who were single (or whose significant others were in the Middle East) went out drinking on Valentine's Day. I ended up at a bar with 3 colleagues including the rude guy from my office in the wee hours of the morning. When I got to my car I realized my boyfriend had tried to call repeatedly. As I drove home he called again and demanded to know where I was. He then told me he didn't want to me to hang out with "those people" and that "one guy from work (rude guy) seemed shady". It turned into a fight that lasted days, and I was finally done. He'd always been irrationally jealous, and I wasn't going to spend a year waiting for that shit to get better. I broke up with him over the phone because there was no other way to do it given that he was overseas for a year.

I felt relieved and ready to live my professional, grown up life. My colleague, the rude guy, asked me to go to a party with him, and I agreed. I was drying my hair and there was a knock at my door which I found surprising because I lived in a secured building. I opened the door, and my ex-boyfriend was standing there, looking like he'd been hit by a truck. I refused to let him in and agreed to meet him for coffee. We met down the street at a coffee shop, and he stood outside smoking before we went in. He'd been gone a few months and suddenly took up smoking? It was so weird.

I reiterated the break up and let him come get all his things. Meanwhile I proceeded to explore things with the rude office guy. I told him I had Crohn's, and he asked what it was. I was so embarrassed I told him to google it, which he did and proclaimed "that doesn't seem fun". But I'd continued Remicade in Michigan and felt really well, so my Crohn's felt very far away.

On an early date with that rude guy from my office at the Detroit Zoo

By spring I was dating the guy from my office who, for the record, was rude that first day because he was angry that I was late for work. I was falling in love, and my health seemed normal as opposed to the previous 6-7 years. But isn't normal overrated?