I Miss Running

Let's be fair - I could've (maybe should've) renamed this blog: I love these towns because part of the deal here is my being in love with cities. The "running" part has been a little lacking in the last few years. I decided 2020 would be the year I began really running again, but we all know 2020 wasn't about to be told what to do.

Earlier this year my friends and I registered for a half marathon the first weekend in October. This was the year I was going to get back into half marathon shape. I've had a four-year hiatus after 22 half marathons, but I was ready to get back into it. 

I bought new running shoes online because of COVID and paid way too much money for new Smartwool socks (my favorite).  I began logging more consistent miles in March and April, and I felt pretty great. I ran a virtual 10k on April 11. It was pretty slow (1:10:46 which is 17 minutes slower than my PR of 53:46) but I was back.

A few weeks later I was in the hospital with a bowel obstruction, and I basically would be starting over. But I jumped right back into it, and by early August was running 6 miles again on the weekends. 

On August 9 I ended up in the hospital again with another obstruction. This time I was there four days, and it took the wind out of my sails. I ran again nine days after I was released from the hospital, but my drive to log lots of miles was gone. The half marathon was canceled because of COVID, as was my motivation.

This fall my Crohn's symptoms have been pretty steady, and I was told in December I would need surgery. Then they backed off that and said I needed a procedure before scheduling surgery. The procedure, on November 5, did not go as planned, so I have another, more invasive procedure on December 1. Right now running isn't exactly in the cards.

But it will be, and I'm committing to start the new year off with miles. If (fingers crossed) my Crohn's issues can be addressed with medicine and not surgery, I'm planning to run every day in the month of January. If I post it here that will keep me accountable, right? I'd love to start running half marathons again, but I'll focus on consistency to start.

I continue to be amazed at what the human body can handle, and I'm trying to be kind to myself. But I miss the way my body and more importantly my mind feels when I run. Fingers crossed I'll be back to it soon.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Some Reasons Why Diet Culture is Garbage: I Poop a Lot and I'm Always Hungry

Image
It was the spring of 1996, and my mom and I were at the mall shopping for my senior prom dress. I had decided I was only going to eat 500 calories a day over the weekend. It was track season, so I couldn't starve myself on practice and meet days, but in my mind it seemed perfectly logical to basically starve my healthy, 17-year-old body on less physical days. I was in the fitting room trying on dresses, and I heard the sales person say to my mom, "Your daughter is so tiny!" I was light headed and nauseous from not eating, but that overheard compliment made me feel like it was all worth it.  Senior Prom 1996 I've struggled with my body image since I was a pre-teen, and in the 30+ years that have passed it's still something with which I struggle daily. I spent years punishing my body so I wouldn't gain weight: eating very few calories and working out for hours, purging, taking laxatives, only drinking alcohol until I threw up so I wouldn't gain weight. It...
Read more

Here's a Shortcut: Do the Work.

Image
I have a confession to make: I don't think I'm my best self right now. I've been thinking a lot about being my best self overall (including fitness which is a huge thing for me), and I've come to a simple, unalienable truth: there is no shortcut. To be the best version of yourself (whatever that means) you have to do the work. I'm not the same version of myself at 46 as I was at 26. (Man could I give that girl some good advice though.) I spend a lot of time reflecting on who I am and who I want to be. While doing the work all the time seems daunting on its surface, it's not. It doesn't mean life has to be a grind 24/7, but it does mean that there is effort in whatever is important to you (which of course is unique to each of us). Where am I willing to do the work to be the best version of me? Fitness. I love exercise. My husband says I'm "obsessed", and I retort that there are way worse obsessions. While I'm logging way fewer miles than I ...
Read more

Why Do I Talk About my "Stuff"?

Image
A few months ago a friend told me someone we knew was venting that I share too much about myself in my blog and on social media. She said (I'm paraphrasing) something like "We all go through stuff. There's no need to share it." At first I was irritated until I realized this person has zero impact on my life. And it's true: we are all going through things. But since then I've been thinking a lot about why I am so candid about things in my life (in particular my struggle with Crohn's Disease).  I was 19 when I got sick. It was so embarrassing. No college girl wants to tell people they're dealing with bloody diarrhea and nausea and horrible cramps. That's the thing about a chronic illness: it's easy to feel like you don't have anyone to lean on. I had my colon removed 5 weeks before I started law school (the delightful adventure chronicled in this blog ). I began law school having lost 30 pounds in less than a month, with steroids puffing up m...
Read more