I Run These Towns

I never wanted to be a lawyer. As a matter of fact my entire life I wanted to be a journalist. I love writing, and in 8th grade announced that I would be Chris Berman when I grew up (which I gleefully told Chris Berman in person when I met him a few years ago but had to confess I wasn't him; I was just a civil servant). I majored in journalism, but I immediately fell in love with my political science courses. At the end of my freshman year I decided to add PoliSci as a double major.  My course load was heavy, trying to earn two degrees. Early in my junior year I found I really wasn't enjoying journalism, and I dropped that major to focus on political science. I joined the debate team, filled with political science majors, and pondered what I was going to be when I grew up. The middle of my senior year dawned, and I had no idea what was next. I applied to both law school and graduate school because I needed to continue my education to remain on my parents' health insurance (...

As a Type A perfectionist, failing is not an option. Of course failure is a part of life, so when I do fail it hits me hard. I tend to beat myself up and dwell on it even though I realize that's not productive. I decided to stare failure in the face and write a series of blogs about what I consider to be some of my most memorable (and for me traumatic) failures and the lessons I've learned as a result. It's hard to admit some of these things, so I'm going to start with something that may seem silly, but it's what I recall as one of my first failures. I loved cheerleading from a very young age. I was on my first cheerleading squad in 2nd grade (Go Madison Colts!) and cheered until I graduated from high school. For me cheerleading wasn't what it is for many of my friend's kids now: this random competition circuit with inappropriately tiny uniforms, make up and "cheer curls". I was an extremely active kid and loved learning cheers and cheering at game...

Two weekends ago we lost our 16-year-old cat. We also got a puppy so it was a weekend of a lot of emotion, but Ellie left this world the way she lived in it: quietly and sweetly. In early 2005 I was out of town, and my brother was feeding my cats. My male cat, Truman, unexpectedly passed away (he was only 5), and I decided I wasn't going to get another cat. When I got home, however, my Daisy was walking around my apartment mournfully crying. After a few weeks of all the crying I decided I would get her another friend.  I found a beautiful, long-haired, grey, 6-month-old cat at a rescue, and I decided I'd adopt her. I picked her up from her foster home, brought her back to my apartment, and she didn't come out from under my couch for two days. She was quiet, shy, and a bit skittish, but after a few months she was quite at home. She loved to lie in the sun in the front window of my first floor apartment, greeting the UPS delivery driver and all of my neighbors. She would stre...

I'm not a religious person, but I often find myself thinking of a story I read years ago entitled "Is Your Cross too Heavy to Bear?" In case you haven't read it:* The young man was at the end of his rope. Seeing no way out, he dropped to his knees in prayer. “Lord, I can’t go on,” he said. “I have too heavy a cross to bear.” The Lord replied, “My son, if you can’t bear its weight, just place your cross inside this room. Then, open that other door and pick out any cross you wish.” The man was filled with relief and said,  “Thank you Lord” and he did as he was told. Upon entering the other room, he saw many crosses; some so Large the tops were not visible. Then, he spotted a tiny cross leaning against a far wall. “I’d like that one, Lord,” he whispered. The Lord replied, “My son that is the cross you just brought in.” When life’s problems seem overwhelming, it helps to look around and see what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself far more fortunate th...

Three years ago I held my three-year-old son as he slept at the new Lansing Mayor's inauguration. I was that new mayor's Chief of Staff, and I dreamily floated through that day in heady anticipation of my dream job. The first few months were a blur, and honestly it really didn't slow down for more than two years. I did not have a single day, not one, without an email, text or phone call. I remember being in Napa for my 40th birthday and being on my third (or so?) mimosa. I got a text that I was needed in a meeting. It was not the first or last meeting I would do after a few cocktails. I was on vacation in Boston and did a 90 minute meeting in the hotel lobby so as to not wake up my napping son. I was on call 24/7. Filed under: ways to feel like super mom At the end of my first year I vowed to find more balance. I blogged about having lost myself and how I resolved in 2019 to do better. I'd spend more time with family, I'd actually take time off, I'd exercise, b...

In 22 years of Crohn's there's always been an answer to my problem: surgery, a new medication, changing my diet, something . It wasn't always an answer that made me feel 100 percent, but I've felt like there was a path toward relative wellness. I've had seven small bowel obstructions (SBOs). My first, in 2012, was pretty minor. I went to the ER, but it started to resolve on its own without treatment. They kept me overnight for observation, but it wasn't a huge deal. In 2014 I had an obstruction following a hernia surgery that required surgery. That's when I learned the word "adhesion" (scar tissue) and that more surgeries create more adhesions. It was a few years later, in early 2017 , before I was hospitalized again. That time I ate a lot of baby carrots and knew that to be the culprit. So ended my love affair with uncooked carrots. It took a few years, but last September I once again ended up with a SBO. It happened again in May and August of ...

December is my favorite month. I love Christmas, and it's also the month of my precious son's birthday and our wedding anniversary (on the same day). Generally December is absolute chaos. I'm planning our annual holiday soiree, our son's birthday party, attending holiday gatherings for work and with friends and preparing to visit family. My head is usually spinning during this month, and I love every minute of it.  This December is quiet. We've been working from home and without child care for nine months, and even though the air has turned colder and our Christmas decorations are up, it feels a lot like the last 273 days. I've really struggled to find the joy this month usually brings.  We decorated before Thanksgiving which is very unusual. Honestly we did it on a day when I desperately needed something to occupy my small human lest I lose my mind. I knew decorating would be very exciting. We put up our two artificial trees and all the decorations, but that di...